Friday, October 08, 2004

But Seriously, Folks

"You look tired." That's what my friend told me last night as I lay on my stomach, enveloped by her giant blue (suede!) beanbag.

We've begun an unofficially official weekly ritual: Once a week I drive down into LA to watch her recording of that week’s episode of “Lost.”

So, I’m there last night while we watch “Will and Grace,” and wait for our Chinese food to arrive. There are papers spread out before me as I’m trying my best to complete task numero 1 from yesterday’s list.

“You seem kind of out of it.”

This statement made from a person that’s known me, really, all of a couple months. Guess I’m an easy read.

I didn't tell my friend--henceforth to be referred to as "G-ters"-- that my roommate--who, henceforth, will not be referred to-- and I had a fight a couple of days ago. And, that she said things that’s caused me not to trust the very essence of who she is. I don’t like her. I haven’t for a long time. For this reason I felt a guilty sense of relief after (and maybe during) the argument; the combination of her foul words and of previous instances of her nearly-as-foul attitude towards me and others has given me sound reason to unabashedly ignore her.

Of course, that night I decided I seriously needed to move.

That, and other goals have goaded me into serious action-mode. That alter-ego really is so focused that I see and hear and think of little else, except blogs and books, of course.

So, last night, as I drowned in the plushy blue blob that I have vowed to one day steal, I agreed with Gters, I blamed my renewed resolve and apologized for my kind of distant-ness. And, she understood.

I think my focus is the reason for my muted attitude. I don’t want to even consider that I’ve attached any kind of emotion to the previously mentioned harsh exchange of words.

My roommate isn’t worth that much power in my life.

I’d rather reserve my funky moods for those that are.

Yesterday's number 1. Done & Done.


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